Soundtrack: The Lemon Song by Led Zeppelin
One 750-ml bottle of Vodka or Everclear
2½ cups sugar
3½ cups water
Italians make some pretty good stuff. This includes, but is not limited to: fast cars, Italian women (fast optional), pasta, sausages, and of course, booze. Limoncello is amongst their finest, right after the women.
This is going to require either a microplane, or a cheese grater on the fine side. You can also use a vegetable peeler or paring knife, but it will be a real nuisance/ headache/time consumer. Take a lemon and zest the skin of the entire lemon into a bowl. The trick is to get all the good yellow part of the skin peels, and none of the bitter white “pith” beneath the lemon skin. If you get very much white pith into the bowl, trim it off the skin, and trash it. Pith on it. Zest all 12 lemons, and set the zest aside.
Get a glass 1 gallon container, preferably with a lid. Put the zest/peels into the container and pour the bottle of hootch (vodka) over it. Cover with the lid or plastic wrap, and let the liquid mixture steep for four days on the kitchen counter.
On day four, put the water and sugar into a saucepan and heat until the sugar dissolves. Let it cool down, and then pour the sugar mixture (which bartenders call “simple syrup”) in with the vodka and lemon zest mixture. Cover and let the mixture set for one more day. Bust out either a big bottle, or a lot of small bottles, and pour the limoncello into the bottles through a strainer to catch the lemon peels as the liquid goes through. If you do not have a strainer, use a CLEAN cheesecloth draped over the bottle, but pour VERY slowly, or you’ll spray sticky liquid all over your kitchen. Probably not the first time you did that, but that was hopefully not in the kitchen...
Once you have successfully transferred the limoncello to bottles, seal them up and refrigerate. It should keep for a month.
Fire up the Godfather, serve her a meal of pasta with one of our fine sauces, and pour her the limoncello in a shot glass after the meal. This stuff is potent. Hopefully so are you.
Variations: use oranges, limes, grapefruit, or a mixture of the above for more hootch-y fun.
 Zest = finely grate using the tool you have. No not that tool, the microplane or grater.
 If it was, well done. Now disinfect that kitchen. With soap.