How to turn a Tenderloin into Filet Minon steaks!

Dilbert wears gloves while cutting Jalapenos. Must read LOL.

Scott Adams (creator of Dilbert) on cutting Jalapeno peppers:

"A few minutes passed, and I felt a tingle in my left hand - the one that directly handled the peppers. The tingle turned into a warm sensation, and the warmth turned into...well, this will take some explaining.

Imagine turning a broom upside down, so the pointy bristles are facing up. You take your hand, palm facing down, and bounce it on the pointy bristles. Can you imagine how uncomfortable that feels on your hand? Okay, good.

Now imagine that a giant troll sees you playing with the broom. He snatches it out of your hand, chews the handle into a point and shoves it so far up your ass that you can taste it. Then he uses you like a huge flyswatter to kill a nest of porcupines that are living in his salt mine. My hand hurt like that."

Story here

Cook a turkey in 45 Minutes!

Dammit Jim, I am an engineer not a stirrer

Time to stir that Christmas Eve Cake!

Cutting the Cheese, I mean Tofu.

Learn how to cut tofu swiftly and easily, plus a recipe for you vegans, vegetarians, and yes, you carnivores.  Did you just make a face?  I've got people.  Don't make me send them over there, Capiche?

Military Recipe April 1957 - Shit on a Shingle (SOS)

 Be sure and get your carcass ready.....

TM 10-412-1

DEPARTMENT OF THE ARMY TECHNICAL MANUAL

ARMY RECIPES

(MEAT, POULTRY,
FISH, GRAVIES, SAUCES,
AND DRESSING)
 

DEPARTMENT OF THE ARMY  -  APRIL 1957

NO. A-34 CREAMED GROUND BEEF ON TOAST

            100 Servings
            1 cup each
            Preparation and cooking time: about 11/4 hours

BEEF, CARCASS...................35 POUNDS
Cut in pieces and grind (FINE).

OR
BEEF, BONELESS,
      GROUND (FINE).............24 POUNDS
Brown beef in its own fat in roasting pans on top of range.
Remove excess fat during cooking period.

ONIONS, DRY,
      CHOPPED (FINE).............1 POUND……....…3/4 QUART
SALT………………..………..5 OUNCES…….......1/2 CUP
PEPPER, BLACK……...……1/4 OUNCE….......….1 TABLESPOON
BAY LEAF…………………………………….........1 LEAF
Add onions and seasoning and mix thoroughly.

MILK, EVAPORATED………………………..........2 GALLONS
(WATER FOR MILK)………........…………………2 GALLONS
Add 3 gallons of milk to beef mixture and heat to simmering, stir-
      ring frequently

FLOUR, WHEAT, HARD.…...2 POUNDS……........1 ¾ QUARTS
Mix flour with the remaining gallon of milk and stir into hot mix-
      ture.
Bring to a boil, stirring steadily, reduce heat and simmer until
      thickened.

TOAST…………………………………………........100 SLICES
Serve on toast.

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